Overwhelming Feels

I’m an empath. It’s not something I talk about often, because not everyone understands or is open to things they don’t understand…. and like everyone else, I don’t like feeling ridiculous.

I can feel peoples energy. Almost without exception. But more than just their energy, or to put in a different way… I can feel what they feel.

Especially their feelings towards me.

It makes it really easy for me to get too emotionally invested in other people’s lives. 

It makes it easy for me to get overwhelmed… To loose sense of my own emotions.

To feel helpless in the face of adversity..

To want to hide…. away from everyone and everything… because sometimes being an empath feels like this :

There are things that we can do… meditation, sleep, nature, exercise….But sometimes I forget this.

Yesterday was one such day. 

Add to it, I have high expectations for the people in my life. I don’t know how to put it exactly… I don’t have people on pedestals anymore… I don’t have the strictest of moral codes and values… At least I don’t think, based on my own mistakes in life…

I guess the only thing I can think of, is I expect people to do no harm. Something that I clearly don’t always live by either.

And I expect people to learn from their mistakes… To be better… To do better.

I found some things out about someone in my life that was extremely disappointing. I don’t know if I want this person to continue in my life or not… which makes me extremely sad… And also confused, because we have a fairly loose friendship as it is. Why do I care so much?

I guess because they already let me down…or maybe because I want to believe they are better than they really are.


And if you think you know who I’m talking about, you don’t. Just sayin

I’m still somewhat lost in my thoughts. All I know, is that I am tired.

But I’m trying to remember what and who brings light to my days and heart. 

I’m searching for sparkles. Because despite my pain, I have a job to do here. It’s spreading love and light … 😀

So on that note….


16 thoughts on “Overwhelming Feels

  1. You do sparkle. i understand exactly what you mean, as i’m an empath as well. Sometimes, i think we see the best version of who someone is inside and it hurts when they don’t (or won’t) let that person come forward. i thought of you last weekend at the Sprint store. Kate Spade makes a cell cover that says “Glitter is my favorite color” and inside the glitter moves around like a snow globe. It’s awesome. i wanted it really badly but SR said it was not as protective as the otter box. So i was practical. Don’t forget to be kind to yourself, okay? 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Thank you sweetie. And that helps… because there is that voice in my head that says this person is at their core, a good soul.
      Even though at the moment, their actions are causing pain and suffering to those they encounter trying to ease their own hurts

      Liked by 1 person

  2. You’ve put into words what it feels like to be an empath better than I have ever been able to. In my own life it’s been a gift but more often a burden that I haven’t known what to do with. Or how to handle. Our how to control.

    When I can feel what those I care about are feeling and experiencing, and it is unsaid, or there is a mask it leaves me struggling with a response and creates a disconnect. Worse than that, sometimes I don’t even recognize the feelings as coming from without me, and take them on as my own. It has created confusion in the past before I worked to learn to recognize it better.

    The most challenging relationship of my life was with a Dominant who was also an empath. At the time I thought I only felt others physical illnesses and pains, and hadn’t learned to recognize the emotional bombardment that I felt wasn’t always mine. We felt each other and feed each other. That was amazing when it was good, and terribly intensely bad when it was negative.

    In addition to being empathic, in also extremely high energy. Intense. So often people are drawn to my energy, even when they don’t know what it is they are feeling. Two empaths in a relationship, of extreme high energy was wrought with challenge. At the time I didn’t know how to control it at all, and it imploded under its own weight.

    All of this is just to say thank you for putting it into words. Extra gifts come with extra challenges. Love you girl.

    Liked by 2 people

  3. We’re all ‘goodness’ in the middle of ourselves; that being said, we also have lots of impulses, desires, and needs that we’re blind to. We even blindly act, or sometimes intentionally act, on those pressures even if they’re not the right thing to do…

    I have come to believe that expectations about outcomes, expectations of people, expectations in and of themselves, are the devil in the details for no one will ever fully meet the expectations we hold in the vaults of our own hearts. This is just my rhetoric though and doesn’t need to be yours.

    We either learn to live with the disappointment, forgive the others for their faults and harms, or don’t. And either way is totally ok. Don’t be too hard on yourself because you saw a more righteous path for someone else and they didn’t take it.

    Liked by 2 people

  4. I had to try to explain to my book club why the horribly sad books they choose just don’t work for me. It’s hard to do sometimes when you aren’t sure people will understand. I’m sorry you’re dealing with someone who let you down. I find it so hard to make the decision to remove someone from my life. Hugs.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. do you ever sit here, or there I guess, and read someone’s blog, and get hit right in the feels cuz you can feel their hurts thru the computer screen? or be in a room, or club/coffee shoppe, wherever’s, and your happy and full of energy an someone comes in an sits a couple feets away from you, and within 5 minutes your fighting to stay awake and have zero energies left? and lastly, how do you stop peoples energies from constantly hammering at you?

    sorry for all the questions.

    and you do have a very positive impact/influence in people’s lives. actually, you and your sparkles help people more than you can ever know 🙂 … just don’t forget to take some you time now and then, to treat an spoil yourself.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yes, I do feel bloggers as I read their words… especially the ones I have established a connection with. It’s hard. Really hard.

      There are times I have to get off WP and disconnect for a while.

      There have been some that I had to unfollow completely and disconnect from entirely… because their pain/disturbance was so wholly overwhelming…. and despite multiple attempts from myself and others, they continued to choose to walk a path of what I can only equate with emotional torture…. Perhaps a form of self punishment? IDK… All I knew is that I had to protect myself or I would get pulled under.

      The energy suck… yeah. But I’m an introvert too, so it’s hard for me to always tell WHAT verus WHO is taking my energy lol.
      But what I can say is that I have learned two things in the last couple of years…. If I feel your energy is bad, that’s that. No trying to make excuses for people or doubting myself. Been there.. done that.
      Bad is bad.

      And, if it’s not necessarily “Bad” energy… but maybe negative, or draining…. well, these people get less access to me. I am mindful of boundaries.

      Hmmm…What else? My friend Scarlett taught me an exercise of visualization. Imagine in your core, a bright golden light… it’s fire. And imagine it burning away all of the feeling/emotion/energy that isn’t yours…
      If you take a moment or two of silence, and close your eyes…..visualize and breathe…. it helps.

      Plus, meditation. YouTube has tons and they are excellent.

      And baths…

      You’re very sensitive. It’s good…. but it can be pretty tough too. Sending you love. And sparkles. 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

      1. thank you for this awesome reply, and for not getting angry for me askin so many questions, i seriously thought somethin was wrong with me 😦 there’s a few blogs i follow where the write says one thing, puts a positive upbeat way of wording things, n i can see thru it an feel the hurt frustrations an angers an sometimes i get so overwhelmed. i wish i knew how to help them, all i can do is just be a shoulder for them to lean on, it kills me that i cant take peoples hurts away, especially B.Butch, Ms Jade, Ms emmi , an you ( when things go sideways on you ) an jdawg too, there’s others but you guys/ladies are the primary ones that i feel the most connected to i dunno why i havent met any of you n prolly never will, but its there 🙂 n i worry lots when things aint goin right for you all,
        so ya, anyways thank you for your awesome answer, n thank you for bein you 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

  6. Yes, people tend to disappoint. Its hard to disappoint someone you don’t know, but I hope to never disappoint you. I think you are a strong and sexy woman, and enjoy your posts. And I am really hoping you find that person that just does it for you. Dont settle for anything less. I Try to envision and create the best version of myself and rise above, but I have shitty negative thoughts at times, despite my best efforts. Honesty and openess is my goal in life because it is so freeing, albeit vulnerable. ..even if it is apparent to everyone when I am not having an honest moment. Appropriate song. .Group – The Record Company, song Pick Myself Up. Have a good day, and sparkle on!

    Liked by 1 person

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